Songs 91 to 85 by Amy X Neuburg

A musical, technical, and emotional retrogression


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Safe love

It's a windex world
My house is glass, my feet are glass
Everything shines blue and grey 
In picture frames and license plates
All the rag doll men in wheel chairs
Want to blame me and it's not fair
Tell me Shhhhh
Tell me it's no better out there
I could fly through my glass doors
I could move to Brazil
I could dance in a big field
I could watch nature get killed in a cage world
It's a brick wall world
There's one inside my head right now
When you hold me close as skin
You are my room, you keep me in
But the bad man's gonna get me
And my own hand's gonna get me
Tell me Shhhhh
Tell me there's nobody out there
And you feel like a warm bath
And you fit like a glove
And you charm with a snake bite
As you hold my head upright in a safe love
It's so easy to be in a safe love
It's enough to drive me insane
But with you here holding my brain 
We can make this pain a more 
comfortable pain than that pain
I could fly through my brick wall
I could fly to the moon 
But you keep me in this world
And you keep me in this room
You burn like a hot bath
You contain like a glove
You consume with a snake bite
As you pull my head upright in a cage love
It's so easy to be in a cage love

Take your eyes out

Forgot to take your eyes out last night
Did it burn in the morning
Did it burn when you woke up
Did you tear when I told you to change yourself
Forgot to take your feet off last night
Did your knees come all undone
Did your nerves come all undone
Did you fall when I told you to tie your shoes
Forgot to turn your face inside out
Forgot to turn your name inside out
Forgot to turn your tongue upside-down
Forgot to turn your whole life around
Forgot to take your eyes out last night
Forgot to take your temperature
Forgot to take one lump or two
Forgot to take the trash out
Forgot to take the lead out
Forgot to clean your fingernails
Go home and clean up your fingernails
Oh oh oh...
Forgot to turn your face inside out
[etc.]
Forgot to turn me over at night
Forgot to ask me if I'm all right
Forgot to make your hair grow upright
Forgot to wavy up your straight line
Forgot to crumple up your next line
Forgot to take a number, stand in line
Forgot to try expanding your mind
Whoops, forgot to stop expanding your mind
Forgot to turn your head off last night
Did it ache when you used it
Did it swim when you kissed me
Did it ring when I called you
and changed your mind
Did I cry when you touched me
Did I scream when you kissed me
Did I laugh when you told me to change my mind
Did you ache when you used me
Did you swim when you kissed me
Did you ring when I caused you to change yourself
Did I cry when you touched me
Did I scream when you kissed me
Did I laugh when you told me to change myself
Turn your head off

In a vacuum

Walking in a straight line is impossible
Walking in a straight line is very hard
Walking in a straight line
Well maybe you can do it
If you really want to
Talking in a vacuum is impossible
Talking in a vacuum is very strange
Talking in a vacuum
Sometimes you have to do it
When you don't really want to
Not dreaming about things you shouldn't
Not dreaming about things that make you feel
Not dreaming isn't real
Sometimes you can't avoid it
Even though you want to
Is there another chance 
Are you missing it
Is there another dream
Does it frighten you
What happens if you walk in a wavy line
What happens if you hold your breath in a vacuum
Keeping up a sweet smile is impossible
Keeping up a nice shape is very hard
Keeping up a pulse racing
What if they make you do it
When you don't really want to
Making up a nice lie is deplorable
Making up a nice bed is very boring
Lying in a nice bed 
is one way to avoid it
When you don't really want to
Stop dreaming about
things you shouldn't
Stop dreaming about
things that make you feel
Not dreaming isn't real
Sometimes you can't avoid it
Even though you want to
Is there another chance
[etc.]
What happens when you walk in a wavy line
What happens when you
hold your breath in a vacuum
Exhale in another room

This is the last

You're making me nervous
What do I do with my hands
What do I do with my mouth
It talks you don't understand
I need these things to keep me awake
I need these things to keep me alive
I need these things to keep me from breaking
I need these things to help me survive
But this is the last smoke
I'll ever have in my life
This is the last smoke until tomorrow

You're making me uptight
I need to relax again
It's gonna be a rough night
It's gonna be a drag again
I need these things to put me to sleep
I need these things to keep me alive
I need these things to keep me from breaking
I need these things to help me survive
But this is the last drink
I'll ever have in my life
This is the last drink until tomorrow

You say it's all right Okay
So why do we talk this way
Can't even get through one day
Without throwing some parts away
We believe in simple truth but it's so complicated
We believe in overkill but it's so overrated
We need these things to keep us in line
We need these things to keep us in tact
We need these things to run from each other
We need these things to cry and come back
We need these things to keep us apart
We need these things to keep us alive
We need these things to keep us from breaking
We need these things to help us survive
But this is the last fight
I'll ever have with you

All right

Sometimes you try to tell me
how I made you a star
How if you'd never met me
you would not be who you are
But then you're always someone else
before you've gotten very far
But that's all right, you're doin' all right
You got a new generation
and a new pair of shoes
And a new set of reasons
 for the money that you lose
And if I weren't accustomed to it
 I'd be totally confused
But it's all right, you're doin' all right
You got a new kind of music
It's a new kind of trend
A new way of talkin'
at the parties you attend
You got a new set of criteria
for who can be your friend
But it's all right, you're doin' all right
Hey, I see you're doin' it your own way
Well that's all right, you're doin' all right 
Keep goin' all right
Pay no attention to what I say
Cuz it's all right...
You can do what you want 
And you can say what you want
And you can be what you want
It doesn't really matter to me
You can have what you want 
And you can take what you want
And you can want what you want
The only thing that matters is that
You're doin' all right
As long as you're doin' all right
Well it's a good thing I met you 
It's a good thing you're there
It's a good thing I never had a 
problem with your hair
And if you wanted to be someone else 
I wouldn't even care
Cuz it's all right...
It's a good thing you met me 
It's a good thing I'm here
It's a good thing you realize 
I won't be around next year
And if I wanted to be modest 
I could try to shed a tear
But it's all right, I'm doin' all right
Hey, I see you're puttin' up a new front
Well that's all right...
Pay no attention to what I want
Cuz it's all right...
You can do what you want... [etc.]
You can think what you want
And you can drink what you want
And you can smoke what you want
The only thing that matters is that 
You're doin' all right...
I like the new way you touch me in your new double bed
With your new graphic equalizer poundin' in my head
And if I weren't about to leave you 
I might hang around instead
But it's all right, we're doin' all right
Hey, I see you're puttin' on a new you
Well that's all right...
Pay no attention to what I do
Cuz it's all right...
You can do what you want... [etc.]
You can laugh if you want
And you can cry if you want
And you can die if you want
The only thing that matters is that
You're doin' all right...

Real world

This is not a tourist trap
This is not a paradise
The people really eat this stuff
The people really live this life
This is how it is in the real world
This is not a photograph
This is not a movie star
The people really look like this
The people wonder who they are
This is how it is in the real world
This is not a reverb box
This is not a party line
The people really talk this way
The people finally lost their minds
This is how it is in the real world
This is not a snow machine
Or an ultraviolet lamp
The people really drive these things
And there isn't any exit ramp
This is how it is in the real world

What to do

Put her up on your wall
Put her up on your pedestal
Put her up on your mountain top
But don't leave her there
Cuz she won't know what to do without you
Hang her up on your wall
Hang her up in your closet
Hang around her all you want
But don't leave her hanging
Cuz she won't know what to do without you
Hope you learned your lesson
Not to get involved with half a person
Ruined by the walls and closets
Ruined by the industry
Ruined by the things you gave her
And the things you took away
Ruined by the pills they gave her
And the sickness that she got from them
Push her into your wall
Push her into a vacuum
Push her buttons and make her go
But don't make her go
Cuz she won't know what to do...
Throw her onto your wall
Throw her onto your throne
Throw her onto your throw rug
But don't throw her out
Cuz she won't know what to do...
Hope you learned your lesson
Not to get involved with half a person
Ruined by the elevators
And the countless flights of stairs
Ruined by the big selections
in the big department stores
Ruined by the things you gave her
Ruined by the things you said
Ruined by her own ambition
and her lack of discipline
Pick her up off the floor
Pick her up in a bar
Pick up after she leaves
But don't make her leave 
Cuz she won't know what to do...
Love her onto the floor
Love her wherever you want 
Love her even more than yourself
But don't tell her so
Cuz she won't know what to do...
Hope you learned your lesson
Not to get involved with half a person
Ruined by the floors and ceilings
And the stuff that's in between
Ruined by the zoos and cages
Ruined by the animals
Ruined by the little boxes
Ruined by the big ones too
Ruined by the things you gave her
And the things she learned in school
Ruined by the air she's breathing
Ruined by the junk she's breathing
Ruined by the words she's breathing
Ruined by the thought of you

Nothing

I'd get upset and write a song about it
but there's a nothin' a happenin'
I only write about a really bad stuff and there's a nothin' a nothin' a
I'd get upset and make you talk about it
but there's a nothin' to talk about
I got a beat and a melody a hey but there's a nothin' a nothin' a
I did not get inspired by the thought of a lovin' you
It's much too good (when I'm there)
to have anything to say about it
It's not the sadness of being so far from you actually it's
this built in pattern on my drum machine 
I never though I'd be a sittin' here a writin' you a something
'bout a nothin' at all
I never thought I'd be a sittin' here a thinkin' and a feelin'
'bout a nothin' at all

I know this isn't goin' anywhere
and there's a nothin' a happenin'
It's  in the same beat the same key the same time the same place
the same song
But that's a better than a wonderin' a hey what's a wrong
what's a happenin'
I only wonder if you really are a something' a nothin' my friends say
You don't exist you're just someone in my imagination
Nothing so good could be so real and so far away
You're just a voice I hear now and then on my answering machine
I think I just erased you from reality the other day
I guess there really isn't anything to say about a nothin'
'bout a nothin' at all
I don't see how I can be sayin' all this stuff about a nothin'
'bout a nothin' at all

I did not get inspired by the thought of a missin' you
I did not get inspired by the thought of a sleepin' alone
I had to think of somethin' to say to complain about
but now I'm lost cuz everything's okay
I never thought I'd be a sittin' here a grinnin' and a laughin' over nothin' at all
I never though I'd be a cryin' tears a goin' down my face about a nothin' at all
I don't see how I can be a sittin' here a happy and a laughin' over nothin' at all
I don't see how I can be a cryin' tears a pourin' down my face about a nothing' at all
 
I know you're waiting for a change now
but there's a nothin' a happenin'
We're in the same beat the same key the same time the same place
the same life
But that's a better than a wonderin' a hey where'd you go 
what's a happenin'
I know exactly where you are you're a somewhere a nowhere
a over there
They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder
It looks to me like absence makes my song grow longer
It's been a slow ascent to wherever we're goin' now
but that's from being lost in the excitement
I never thought I'd be a sittin' here a groanin' and a sweatin' 
'bout a nothing' at all
I never thought I'd be sittin' here a thinkin' and a feelin' 
'bout a nothin' at all
I don't see how I can be singin' and a laughin' and a cryin' 
over nothin' at all
I don't understand why I'm a  sayin' all this stuff about  a nothin'
'bout a nothin' at all
about a nothin' at all
Why am I laughin' and a cryin' and a thinkin' and a moanin' and a groanin'
  'bout a nothin' at all

It never ends

In your mind the deception is devastating
In this time there's no time to explain it and
Imagination keeps me here
And imagination keeps you near
And it never ends
It never ends

In this life why does pain have to be pervasive
In this time there's no time to be sad about it
In my mind things go too fast
But in your mind it's still the past
Because it never ends

I could stay awake all night and finish what I started
But even as I sleep I know that
This will still be here because it never ends

You could live forever and finish what you started
But even if you died tomorrow
You would still be here because you never end

In my mind there's a drug keeping me from crying
In my hands there's a numbness from too much thinking
If I stopped and told you now
Would it really matter anyhow
Would it ever end
It never ends

Keep us 2

You got away from me one time
You got away from me two times
Not gonna get away a third time
Not gonna get away this time
Just about to give up hope
World fell apart I could not cope
But then I went out and bought some rope
And now I got you hangin' on a tether
Gonna keep us together, keep us 2
You said you loved me that first time
You said you loved me the next time
This time you didn't say a word but
I think I know what's on your mind
If you think it won't work out
Just listen to me I have no doubt
I'm going to make you scream and shout
Cuz now I got you hangin'...
You can fight but that's not enough
You can struggle but I got you handcuffed
You can beg, get down on your knees
Do what you want but I'm hard to please
I got you hangin' and I won't let go now
Got you hangin' and it's my show now
I don't care what you have to say
I promise I'll walk you twice a day
I got you hangin...
This time we're doin' it my way
This time we're doin' what I say
No more will I crawl in the dirt
This time I'm not gonna get hurt
And if you try to wander off
I'll pull on the rope and make you cough
And then I'll take your clothing off
Cuz now I got you hangin...

Get you out

I want just one thought that's not in the first person
Just one thought that's not about me
Just one thought that's not about you
One that's not about you and me
Didn't want to be an egotist
But I'm the first person on my list 
Didn't want to get into this
But you're the next person on my list
I can't get you out of my goddamn mind
Every god damn thing reminds me of you

Could have gone to California this summer
Could have gone away far away
But you made me come back to you
And you made me a fool of me
Said I wouldn't write a song about it
But it all came out so easily
Hope you're having a good time baby
Fucking up my life for me
I can't get you out...

Somebody get me out of this place
Somebody get me out of here
Somebody get you out of this place
Somebody get you out of here
Either you or I should move it out
To some other hemisphere

Try not to make it hell for her
The way you made it hell for me
You can't love anyone
The way that you said you loved me
No creature on earth deserves to be treated so cruelly
No creature on earth deserves to sleep with you except for me
One thing I don't understand is why I still have dreams about you
I just want to cry about you
I just want to scream about you
Can't get you out...

HOT

When I first met him
When he walked into the room
He was nothing special
He had his hair all in his face and big glasses
And far too many clothes
And he walked kind of slow like nothing mattered
But when he first spoke
When he opened up his mouth
I can still hear it
I can hear him whisper
He said My god it's hot
My god it's hot
It's too hot

I knew I had to have him
I knew I had to cool him off
I had to cool him down
But I couldn't cool him down cuz he was too hot 
Every time I tried to touch him he got even hotter
I could feel it pouring down
Oh my god it's hot..

I knew I had to do it
But there was nothing I could do
Cuz it was so hot I could hardly even move
The closer I got the hotter it became 
I could feel it steaming
I could feel it pouring down
He was radiating
And when he opened up his mouth I knew I had to have him
I can still hear it
He said My god it's hot...

I just looked at him and felt him radiate
And heard him talking to me or whoever he was talking to 
It didn't matter
Cuz after what he said I knew I had to have him
I'd do anything to have him
Oh my god it's hot...

Today I can't touch him
But some day before I die I wand to burn with him
It could be the day I die 
I want to steam with him
I want to melt with him
But I can't even touch him in the middle of July
Oh my god it's hot...

All songs written by Amy X Neuburg and copyright 1992 by spoonerISm music. All rights reserved. These lyrics were uploaded with the permission of the publisher and the artist.